Friday, June 12, 2009

Celeb Hotties: Are They FIT To Be IT??

Okay....ENOUGH people!!

I think someone's finally got to say it....

Is it just me, or have the standards of being that new hot "Flavor Of The Month" or the Celebrity "IT" Babe or the Hunky Hambone "Himbo" of the year dropped down to pretty much nil......ish?

(Wait, isn't that a school of philosophy? Nilish? If not, it damn well should be!! lol :P )

YESSS I'm going to talk about Megan Fox (unfortunately) so prepare your souls!

I really don't get it.

What's so freakin' great about Megan Fox?

(Yes I've seen pics of her...and Noooooo I'm not gay....well at least not for today Sugah Hunnybunny! *air kiss* lol :) )

I confess that up until about 2 months ago I didn't even know who the Hell she was.


I mean am I expected to remember EVERY piece of summer movie eye candy that couldn't even get a memorable name credit next to Shia La Boofer....err....I mean Beouf or however the Hell you spell it! :P

And Now I have a good friend named Antoine who has finally abandoned his crush on ANOTHER former IT girl ScarJo in favor of The M. Fox.....and thinks that quite possibly she could be the hottest woman in the world now.

No way. Hot yes, but the hottest off the ests?? so TOTALLY no way!!!

(In my opinion the hottest woman in the world MUST have D cup REAL least!! You can be in the Top Five with smaller ones, but there's NO FREAKIN WAY you're getting to number one hottie without letter D's. Gotta put the FULL in Full-figured, Just how I roll...cracka dawgs! ;) )

Oh, and one last quick comment about this beautiful twit's most recent blab regarding Megatron, Herself, and alleged blue-collar white trash idiots,,,,,ummm....has anybody else dared to look at this "woman's" bio?

According to her IMDB.COM profile, she was born in.... get this......ROCKWOOD, TN!!

Isn't that like the illegal pot-still calling the kettle black?? lol :D

Okay, enough about Megan Fox and now on to one more quickly before I make like a double-jointed Romanian Female Gymnast and split....

The Porn Queen turned recent mainstream actress Sasha Grey....

Nope, I'm not picking on the girl personally, I swear....Hell if I were a porn actress (and I'm NOT just in case you were hopelessly confused ;) ) and I got the chance to star in a mainstream motion picture with Steven Soderberg and got to actually ATTEMPT to act before having to whip out my Vajay-jay, I'd jump to that shiat in half a second too!

But The girl's name is all over the Triple X world, and all over a certain late night Showtime reality show and occasionally on the spastic screaming E channel (E! ). like she's the best thing to hit the medium since sliced...AstroGlide.... Sasha Grey Sasha Grey Sasha Grey...

Here's the thing though, have you actually SEEN this woman SPEAK or try to ACT??

Can you say HUMORLESS ROBOTIC MONOTONE Kiddies?? I KNEW you could!

She always looks and sounds like the most unenergetic, perpetually BORED human being in the entire world Seriously, I've seen Data crack more smiles than this chick. Even in his EPIC porno appearances. (LOL, J/K )

Like I said, she may be a cool person to know off-camera I dunno, but let's run down what I see ON camera... 1. freakishly tall, 2. tiny boobs 3. pretty face, but 4. No apparent outward personality to speak of.

To close out here, again I ask....What is the appeal of so many of those touted to ad-nauseam as today's "IT" Celebrities?

Have we REALLY gotten to the point in our Pop Culture that expecting PEROSNALITY, Class, and basic Intelligence in our Celebrity Gods and Goddesses is not only no longer en vogue...but even frowned upon?

"Oh sure Doll, you can be a complete classless TWIT who runs your mouth all the time (Fox) or a Stepford Wife (Grey) as long as you've got a smokin' hot face!! We don't give a faaaack!! Let's do lunch toots!!"


Bottomline, Personality and Class still matter to me in MY choice of worship-worthy beauties....

What's YOUR take, Daywalkin' Blogsters??


individually wrapped slices said...

"Bottomline, Personality and Class still matter to me in MY choice of worship-worthy beauties...."
HAHA! But they must have triple Ds boobs.

Megan Fox is hot.

You probably like those weird, ginger eccentric girls. Its cute now when they nibble on you but wait until you wake up all bloody and she's got a body part of yours in a ziploc bag on the highway. Weird, oddball isnt always the go-to choice.

And, about the porn thing, Im sure you've heard on the news about 16 HIV cases showing up in the porn industry.

Safety first. Then think about your burning loins.

individually wrapped slices said...

HAHA Im a total killjoy.
Thank you I'll be here all night.

Anonymous said...

Sasha Grey is actually kinds short.I have no idea where you got that freakishly tall thing from. She's like 5'6".

But par for the course for you though, your writing kinda sucks.

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