Tuesday, March 17, 2009

How To Tell If You're Irish American

Your Mother/Wife/or You use your crock pot at least once a week. (Pot roast, pot roast, stew, and more pot roast! :P :D )


You have at least four relatives each with the names Mary, Francis, Catherine, Rosemary or any combination of the above.

You've gotten in a heated argument with someone defending the "Irishness" of Danny Boy

You have "Ruler scars" on your hands and knuckles.

Crazy Nun

You burn in the sun like a Vampire. (Okay TECHNICALLY we Vampies don't burst into flames, anyway, it's just a joke! )

Bella Vamp Redhead

You've spent much of your childhood on your knees, and are then made to feel guilty about the time you've spent "on your knees" as an adult!

You liked The Departed and Gangs of New York, but were still a tad irked that they were made by Scorsesse and starred Leonardo Di Caprio (read: Italians/Non-Irish)

The Departed

You own every album by the Dropkick Murphys. (Or if you're a chick, substitute in Celtic Woman)

Dropkick Murphy

Celtic Woman

You only HALF-like Daniel Day-Lewis ( he's half Irish, Half English )

Daniel Day Lewis

You have at least one relative each on the Police force, the Fire Department, Sanitation, in the Priesthood, or that owns a Bar.

You've had potatoes for breakfast, lunch, and dinner before.

How to tell the difference....

Non-Irish, but wants to be on St. Paddy's Day: Harp Lager

Harp Lager

Half-Irish or Irish American: Guinness Draught

Guinness Draught

100% Irish: Guinness Extra Stout.

Guinness Xtra Stout

You've seen The Quiet Man and The Bells of St. Mary's more times than you can count.

You have about 20 Johns, Michaels, and Patricks, in your family, about a dozen Pauls and Peters, and about 5-6 Timothys.

You damn to Hell Michael Flatley the "Lord of The Dance" every chance you get, yet have a secret crush on Meav of Celtic Woman.

Lord of The Dance

You know what the heck a Shillelagh is.

Shillelagh Boy

You've gotten in a fight with a Shillelagh, or know what it means to invoke "Shillelagh Law" on someone.

Finlay Shillelagh

You will never play professional basketball.

You've never hit your head on the ceiling.

You swear well....and often.

You think you sing very well.

You have no idea how to make a long story short! (Especially when giving someone directions!)

Irishman giving directions

There isn't a big difference between you losing your temper or killing someone...

You are secretly poetic, and have shed a tear over a beautiful sunrise or sunset when no one's looking.

You know at least one guy named Murphy.


You love telling a dirty joke or a dirty Limerick.

and finally...

You're reading this and laughing turning beet red, or getting pissed and "wanting to make something of it" with the guy who wrote this!

Hope you had a Happy St. Paddy's Day!

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