Thursday, March 12, 2009

Cavemen Are People Too!

I just got through watching this DVD of a rather muy interesting programme that ran on the Discovery Science Channel, or something like that thereabouts.

Oh, and just as a quick vampiric sidebar, don’t you just LOVE the way Canadians and Brit-tacular royal subject people spell things? Centre instead center, programme for program, gang colours for gang colors, hockey instead of basketball, curling instead of real manly sports? All so deliciously eccentric! You may step back now.

Anyway, These science geek anthropological dudes took a bunch of Neanderthal bones from like, all over the world and junk…and they put them together into one chopshop Frankenstein of a caveman, to learn more about their bodies. And I gotta say, as I was watching this Frakensteinian process as it was rapidly unfolding, only one thought crossed my mind…

A clip from Young Frakenstein, one of the funniest movies ever made….

Yes, you may thank me!!

Anyhoo….while I had questions as to how they could know all this gabbladi-gook about cave dude humans after assembling a chop-shop one from the parts of different male cave dudes who never met each other, or even swapped emails or porn pic site links…(like, how do they know that all cavemen folk looked like that, or were big brutes in the chest area with high-pitched Mickey Mouse voices if they’re all parts from different people?)

….but yeaaap I still found it fascinating….most definitely so.

I mean, Vampires and Neanderthals have A LOT in common yaknow.

Stop doing that eye-roll-y-poll-y thing at the screen…you KNOW I’m right about this…if nothing else!

We’re both humans, different types of humans that are NOT thought of as humans by the majority Normie Daywalker cool-kid kinds of humans!

We have our own adaptations that are different from the norm.

We’re rare.

We live on the fringes of society.

We’re both often misunderstood….they as dumb uber-retarded brutes with hairy phucked up foreheads and spear-chucker shenanigans and us as killers who all have widow’s brows, turn into bats and do nothing but kill people and drink all their blood.

Oh yeah, and I also forgot to add that we’re also both BIG MEAT hunters.

Just the same as a MILF who goes club-hopping in the valley. (Smirky-smirk!)

Yet, what do (or did) the majority of the “eggheads” think about cavemen…and teach to the kiddies in school?

That they were dumber…that they had no culture….that they could only grunt like Tim Allen in front of a ridiculously large chainsaw (or during a buck-naked body cavity search while in prison. What? It was entertaining for him!)

That the all-powerful Cro-Mag humans evolved better and did the Stone Age equivalent of bustin’ a cap in all their Neanderthal asses!! That “modern” humans did a Houdini on the cavemen because they’re a superior species.

Isn’t that kinda…I dunno…maybe a little….RACIST of the all knowing scientists?? Aren’t we supposed to be past that “Social Darwin” crap?

Aren’t Cavemen people too?

Just like Keith Richards!!

I know one thing, I am a people…err…a person…

…..who like BIG BUTTS and I-cannot-LIE! What anuther-brutha can’t DENY…that when a girl walks in with an itty-bitty waist he just gets SPRUNNG….

Uhh….Yeah, I think you get the idea….

Maybe in learning about our past humanist-ca-logical diversity we can learn how to better deal with the flesh buffet…err…the colourful VARIETY of peoples and cultures we have today.

Maybe yet we can all expand our definition of what it means to be a human.

Maybe I can stop pretending that I’m so pale because I used to work as a mime…and I still carry the scars…the HORRORS of war in the mime-dom.

Believe people, BELIEVE!!

So…care to share or think about YOUR opinions on Humanoid diversity?
On Cavemen??
MIMES?? ( lol ;) )
What do YOU think??
Do you think Scientists are acting bigoted in their attitude toward Cavemen and other human groups versus "Modern" Humans?

Oh, speaking of buffets… who wants to go to an all-night Chinese food buffet place? The General’s Chicken is calling my name!! (Wait, You’re paying…right?)

Took Both The Red ANNND the Blue Pill…just to be permanently Indecisive,


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